Question: I have been with my girlfriend for 6 years. We were together when we were in high school. Now we have just graduated from college. We basically get tired of being together every day. My girlfriend is very good to me, and of course I can't bear to be separated from her, but I feel that we only have family ties now, and no longer have the feeling of being in love. I feel very distressed now, and I'm also afraid that I won't be able to go on in the future because I don't have feelings. Why? What to do?
What should a couple do if their relationship fades after being together for a long time?
Answer:
In fact, most people can’t tell the difference between desire and love, and like to wrap those desires into the appearance of love. Why? Because I feel embarrassed to express my desires directly and nakedly, and it is not accepted by the world, so I use the word love. After all, it is noble and makes people feel beautiful, so those who may have been difficult to The desire to tell is packaged in this way, and I feel at ease.
These desires generally come from one's own shortcomings. For example, if one's own emotional control ability is relatively poor, then one hopes that the other person's emotions will be stable. If you can coax yourself, for example, if your soul is empty, you have no hobbies, and nothing to put your trust in, then you hope that the other person can lead you to grow in an interesting way. For example, if you are alone and feel very empty and boring, then you hope that the other person can be more Companionship gives you a sense of security.
These tasks that originally belonged to the category of self-growth and self-improvement, just found a perfect shopkeeper. Yes, it is love. As long as you combine it with love, everything becomes so easy, but it has to be so tiring. Why bother myself? Isn’t it beautiful to have someone willing to give me what I want? It’s so tiring to try and transform on my own. The hard work is no different than peeling off the skin. No matter how you look at it, it’s easier to find someone to rely on. Moreover, how can we say that we are relying on each other? This is obviously love. Shouldn't love be like this?
So while enjoying the vested interests of the other party with peace of mind, at the same time, he is complacent about self-aggrandizement, without any sense of violation or any sense of gratitude. Don't ask, isn't that what true love should be like? ? Do you want anything in return? Isn’t it the most basic thing for him to tolerate me if he loves me?
Some even invented Level 10 Chicken Soup: If you can’t accept my bad, you don’t deserve my good either.
Mom, if you don’t know, we thought you were inlaid with gold. You have to go through nine or nine or eighty-one hardships to finally become the lucky one.
As time goes by, when it becomes natural to ask for things, you will unconsciously spurn the other person. This is normal, because after the old desires are satisfied, new desires will still sprout.
Have you ever thought that love is not actually a rescue station? Love is more of a magnifying glass version of a magic mirror, which shows your true appearance at a glance, leaving you nowhere to hide. In addition to the magnifying function, you emptinessBoredom, your soul has nothing to rely on. In love, you will feel twice as empty, twice as anxious, even dissatisfied with your desires, many picky, and unhappy no matter what. In fact, that is who you are and has nothing to do with love.
What is love? I think love is the abundance, peace, and joy that emanate from ourselves when we have become perfect. The energy that attracts another individual through the same frequency resonance is called love.
Love is a luxury product. Most people have never encountered love in their lives. Love is a high-level emotion that appears in two people who have very advanced cognition and tend to be perfect themselves.
You are empty and boring not because you have no love, but because you are an empty and boring person in the first place. If you can’t swim, changing to several swimming pools will not help.
What you have to do is not to find a lover who can satisfy all your desires, but to think carefully about who you can really stand in this society and be chosen in the marriage and love market in addition to your age advantage. Wherever your competitiveness lies, spend time cultivating and polishing it. Those are the foundation for your livelihood and the weapons that will enable you to survive in this cruel society for a long time.
