The relationship develops too slowly. Maybe the two of them parted ways before it reached the end. But it seems not good if the relationship develops too fast. Look at the final endings of those couples who got married in a flash marriage. Is this really the case? Let me analyze for you the relationship development too fast, okay? In fact, as long as you consider the following 10 points, even if you get the marriage certificate right now, it won't be too fast.
1. Do two people have sufficient financial resources?
How can love come without bread? In marriage, although money is not the most important, it must be necessary. In reality, In marriage cases, the miserable situation of poor and humble couples emerges one after another. Taking into account loan repayment, entertainment expenses, and maintenance of quality of life, if two people can still save more than 30% of their total income, then at least from a material life point of view, they are capable of getting married, and there is a high probability that they will not quarrel frequently over money. .
2. Are the concepts of bride price and dowry consistent?
There are many couples who break up because of the bride price issue. If they cannot agree on this matter, then they cannot consider getting married at all. How much and how to give the bride price and dowry, and whether the money belongs to one parent or to the entire family. This issue must be communicated well before the marriage. These things may seem like trivial matters, but if we can't agree on them, then the marriage must be concluded. Soon.
3. Whether the original families of both parties are healthy
This is very important. Many times, when people manage relationships, they are actually imitating the shadow of their parents. Psychologically speaking, more than 90% of people's bad behaviors can actually be traced back to the roots of their original family.
Therefore, before getting married, be sure to understand whether the other person’s family of origin is healthy, and also consider whether there are any historical problems in the other person’s family (such as debts, criminal records, etc.). Only by ruling out marriage first Hidden dangers, you will have a complete marriage as much as possible.
4. Have two people lived a real life?
Without the experience of real life, you will never know the unknown side of your partner. When in love, this person may be delicate and clean, but at home he may not even wash his socks; on weekdays, he seems quite capable, but he may not even be able to tell the difference between vinegar and soy sauce. Don't think that all the little things can be reconciled after marriage. Many times, it is these undiscovered little things that make two people exhausted physically and mentally after marriage.
5. Are the views on fertility consistent?
One topic that cannot be avoided when getting married is "having children." Marriage is not a romantic joke, but a father-son relationship between two families for future generations. If one of the two people does not want children, or does not want children in a short period of time, this issue needs to be discussed before marriage.
6. Are future plans consistent?
If there is a conflict in future planning and two people have to give up their own future because of this relationship, then this conflict may seem to be settled temporarily, but it will inevitably leave the seeds of resentment in each other's hearts, and sooner or later it will lead to successive conflicts. .
7. How to balance the division of labor in the family
Who is in charge? Who is in charge? This is something two people must consider before getting married. I have seen too many couples arguing endlessly because of "Why don't you take care of your family" and "I don't go out to socialize and wait to drink the northwest wind", and finally get into a fight. After getting married, two people become the backbone of a small family or even two big families. If these two backbones are at odds with each other and compete with each other, then life can easily lead to a fate of two feathers.
8. Is the sexual life harmonious?
Although this issue is a bit difficult to discuss, it profoundly affects the quality of life of both husband and wife. Don't think that this thing is dispensable. The real case is that - unhappy marriages, more than 70% of couples have disharmonious sex lives, and the consequences are infidelity, cold violence and separation.
9. Do you really love each other?
In marriage counseling, many marriages are unclear at the beginning. It's not for nothing - I don't know why I chose this person, and I don't know what the other person likes about me. The two people entered the marriage in a hurry. If two people have no love and come together just because they are suitable, then they will have no urge to enjoy their life in the future. I suggest you not to rush into marriage.
10. Are you really ready for marriage?
Many people get married and have children, but in essence they are still a giant baby and have never learned what responsibility is. They rush into marriage. Once the burden of life comes down, the couple has no ability to solve it and can only escape. So, when you want to face marriage, you might as well ask yourself: Are you really ready? Do you really have the courage to face the changes in your marriage? Do you really want to face the difficulties of life hand in hand with this person?
